Road Rage & How to Avoid It

I received an email recently from a good friend of mine.

He is a top martial artist and all round good guy.

This is what he sent:


Dear Martin,

This week I was involved in a road rage incident where a street biker thought he was on the race track and overtook us on the inside (doing about 100km).

My son in the car has ASD and noise sensitivity and he was freaked out by this

I gave a long honk on my horn

The guy took offence to that and followed us 

Confronted me while trying to exit the vehicle

I would like to discuss more details if you have the time

This happened 3 days ago

And I have been in deep thought about it since

The only conclusions I have are

I was totally unprepared 

I was scared 

I was not afraid (maybe a little bit) thanks to your training I was able to maintain some composure 

Any training I have had so far did not prepare me for this situation

I was totally not in control of the whole situation

There is more to the story

When can I talk to you?

To discuss this


I caught up with him on the telephone and we had an informative chat and he explained the incident in more detail.

This guy actually damaged his vehicle whilst my colleague and his son went into a shopping centre.

This is my advice:

First and foremost:

AVOID confrontation at all times.


Why risk getting into trouble?

Getting injured…maybe having your life taken from you?

Injuring the perpetrators even accidentally taking their life?

Jail time?

Disruption to your family?

Disruption to their family

Financial costs

Emotional turmoil

ALWAYS think about the consequences of your actions.

DO NOT let your EGO control you.


We also need to:

  1. Get into an appropriate mindset to avoid the above happening.
  2. Implement situational awareness.
  3. Avoid confrontation at all costs.
  4. If you aren’t able to action the above and it escalates then make sure that you secure your vehicle with yourself and others inside by enabling your central locking whenever you stop at traffic lights, road junctions, parking areas and similar.
  5. Ensure your car windows are closed with your aircon activated or wind the windows down slightly. Just enough to get some air but narrow enough to stop a grab or punch or someone going for your car keys whilst you are inside.
  7. In the email my friend aggravated the situation with his frustration by honking the horn at him which in turn activated his ego! I know it’s difficult but don’t do it.
  8. Take a deep breath and count to 10 and tell yourself you will not let this guy have power over you…it’s him that has a problem.
  9. Do NOT get out of your vehicle to confront anyone.
  10. You are vulnerable as you get out of your vehicle.
  11. You have momentarily given up your structure and he has good structure so you’re in trouble.
  12. If you find yourself in a situation where you have no choice to defend yourself ensure you position yourself ready to take his posture by pushing him back and de-escalate the situation verbally as you do so.
  13. You may have to use a restraint action and/or a striking action to protect yourself so be prepared.
  14. Always have a plan of action in your mind and unleash it as appropriate.

So there you are.

Don’t get involved.

Til next time.

Keep safe.

Shihan Martin Day